Of course a weekend like this, can be hard for an infertile like me. I wanted nothing more than to be pushing a stroller and introducing classmates and old teachers to my little ones. I wanted my kids in a wagon for the kiddie parade. And I've never wanted anything more than to give my husband a child, when he said Friday night as we pulled into my hometown: "If we have kids someday, won't it be great to bring them here to show where you grew up?" Yes honey, it will.
While I was having those thoughts, I was counting all of my blessings this weekend too. I got to dance with my dad to an Elvis song at the street dance and my mom and I were laughing and taking pictures to send to my classmate so he would send us a drink. A few of my friends from back home, their parents weren't there this weekend. Instead, they had flowers in their parents memory to take pictures of; too young to lose a mom or dad. I looked across the street dance and saw a guy a few years older than me talking with his wife, and I know they gave birth to a baby boy full term this winter. He took one breath and passed away. I talked to my classmate's mom at the pancake breakfast. She knows what Gav and I are going through from my mom, and her daughter has also had struggles starting a family. Except she almost died with her 3rd miscarriage because the baby had implanted in her tube. Now she has 1 tube left, and it is blocked.
We've had our struggles, but we've had so many blessings and I will always be thankful for the gifts God has given me. Nothing like going back home to give me a reminder though! Like my grandma told me once, "there's always someone going through something harder than you." We sure did miss Grandma Mabel this weekend.
|Me, Dad, & Mom at the street dance|
Baby making news: The clinic left me a message yesterday. They got some of my blood work back. I've been taking the same dose for my under-active thyroid for years, but they are going to check my levels. She also said she was sending some information in the mail. Could it be donors to look at??? She didn't say, but maybe!
Happy 4th of July!! - Sarah