22 Weeks

22 weeks and 1 day today, and shit is starting to seem real folks!  Just took a little over half the pregnancy.   I think it is starting to sink in because plans for summer are starting to pop up and I'll catch myself thinking about planning something and then suddenly think, oh wait we'll have a baby then.  This summer we won't be able to last minute go to a baseball game and drink beers in the sun all afternoon.  Well, we can but we'll have to find a sitter, pump, and I don't even know what else would go into that kind of day.  Here's the scoop for 22 weeks!

Little One:  Weighs about 1 pound and is about 11 inches long.  His or her eyes are formed and tiny tooth buds are developing beneath the gums.

Momma is feeling great and loving being pregnant.  Heart burn and bloody noses are the only pains.  I've gained 18 pounds since starting meds.  While this pregnancy is finally feeling real, I still have fears.  Today I bought 2 huge boxes of diapers because they were on sale but had thoughts of what I would do with all these diapers if something goes wrong.  I almost put them back and thought about coming back after our appointment.  Will that ever go away?  Nothing sounded better than hearing the heartbeat again today.  I still have no movements to report that I know of; and that's what everyone asks me.   So I have to break it to people and say about 10 times a day how I can't feel anything yet.  Doctor said any day now.

Daddy:  Things are getting real for daddy too.  He's really thinking about the budget and it sounds like my 5 year shopping spree that he calls it is coming to an end.   He also seems to think that we will just sit around and not leave the house all summer with a new baby.  I'm trying to explain that you can bring a baby places.

House hunting:  There are finally some houses on the market in the last week or two.  We've looked at 4 so far, none to get real excited about but we're hoping it's a sign that more and more will be coming up for sale.

22 week bump

And Then There Were Four...

Four grand-babies in one summer that is!  Word is out and it's safe to share that there will be 4 new babies on my side of the family this summer.  My sister is expecting twins you probably remember, and my sister-in-law and brother are expecting in July making my nephew, Howie, a big brother.  We found out at Thanksgiving and my dad kept saying how crazy next year will be.  It will be wild, but I am so happy that our little one will have cousins so close in age.  Here we are partying at my parent's a few weeks ago, drinking our NA beers.  Congrats Brock, Robin, and Howie!

20 Week Vacation

The app on my phone said last week that I should do something to celebrate the half way point of pregnancy.  My trip to NV last weekend was perfect timing.  Sorry if this post is boring, but my family that reads I'm sure will like to see the pictures.  I went with my brother, sister-in-law, and nephew to visit my parents where they winter now.  The weather wasn't what we were hoping for, but it was still a lot warmer than being at home.  It wasn't like the last time I was in NV, being pregnant and all, but we had a great time.  We did a little shopping, ate out, played cards, got pedicures, met my parents new friends, and laughed a lot.  We also entertained my nephew by visiting a duck pond, a children's museum, and a park. Of course I did a little gambling, which I say is the only naughty thing I can do anymore!  My parents made sure we had a good time so we'll come back next year.

Mom trying to lift me at the children's museum!

Family at the museum

Half Way

This post is a little late, on Sunday we were at 20 weeks, half way there!

Little One:  Is about the size of a banana and weighs a over 10 ounces.  His or her digestive system is busy practicing for life on the outside this week too.

Momma:  According to the baby app on my phone, I should have gained 10 pounds by now.  I am ahead of schedule in this area.  Great.  I am currently at the same weight I was at in my second year of teaching, when I lived all alone and didn't do much besides snack, my big days.  From here on out, I will gain about a pound a week.  Hmmm....  I'm feeling great, but have just one complaint, heartburn.  I didn't even know what this was 5 months ago, but it's been bothering me at night lately.  

20 weeks, me and baby in Vegas!

Daddy:  I'm not real sure how daddy is feeling this week.  With me being gone for a long weekend and something going on every night this week, I haven't seen him much.  I do know he missed the little one and me while we were gone because he said, 4 nights was a long time, you're never gone for that long.  He is definitely noticing that baby and I are growing!    

A Baby Girl

Everyone has guessed that we're having a girl except for one person.  People are making their "educated" guesses based on the little one's heart rate, my pulse, and even a math formula based on my age and the month of conception.  

Did you think that we opened the envelope?  Ha!  Thought I would get people excited by the title!  Just wanted to write a post about what people are guessing.  I actually don't even know where the envelope is, Gavin put it somewhere and it's not bugging him to look anymore either, or maybe he already did.

And for a few random updates:

We looked at a house tonight after work.  It was well over the budget, but we like the neighborhood, and I thought it would make me feel better to look at a house, lift my spirits that we will someday we will be homeowners again.  Gav didn't want to go because of the price.  He was worried I'd fall in with it and he would have to break my heart.  Turns out it wasn't a great house on the inside so he was worked up for no reason.  

I'm heading down south to see my parents, the snowbirds, tomorrow.  Of course, it's supposed to cool down while we're there, but it will still be warmer than up here.  Excited to see them and for them to see the little one.  Talk to you for a 20 week update in a few days, half way!!!!  

Still Stings

I've been reading infertility blogs for about 4 years, and for awhile was probably even addicted.  I've loved reading about others experiences and learned a lot through these blogs.  Almost every infertility blog I ever read would post about getting to the other side or finally beating infertility when they were pregnant.  I also read posts about once an infertile always an infertile.  I am now relating to these posts.

I went back to school last week, to news of a pregnancy.  Right away the same feelings came rushing to me, like when I would here about pregnancies before I was pregnant and wanting nothing more.  My brain didn't forget.  Why do I still think like this?  I have a baby growing in me, I am blessed, I'm on the other side now.  But there they were, the feelings of wondering why is it so easy for everyone else, thinking it's not fair, and jealousy.  I think it stings a little more because this announcement is days after peeing on a stick which is just annoying to me.  Don't people know that 5 weeks, is too early to tell the world?   I'm over 19 weeks and still nervous telling people.

I realize these are feelings are ones I will have the rest of my life.  My story and journey will always be different and I will always feel a little pain and have to deal with it. It's all I've known for 5 years.  Once an infertile, always an infertile, but it was the plan for us.  We went all in, and it's made us stronger, but it still stings a little.

A New Year and 18 Weeks

Sorry for my lack of blogging over the holidays.  My break from school was busy and of course went way too fast.  This might be a long post to get you up to date.

Sunday put us at 18 weeks pregnant.

Little one is the size of a bell pepper and ears are now in their final position.  I just hope that position is not sticking out!  Boy or girl parts are developed and visible in an ultrasound (more on this later).

Momma is feeling so good and enjoying every minute.  Sometimes I think I feel movement, but usually decide it's in my head.  Every new step of this pregnancy I'm so amazed it's happening for us, and sometimes I just cry I'm so happy.  I went to visit my grandparents after Christmas.  My grandma spoiled me with home cooked meals and made sure I ate from all the food groups.  My grandpa couldn't believe me tummy (when I said I was showing a little he said, "I thought it was showing quite a bit.") and he kept saying to be sure someone lets him know when the baby comes.  Only little thing to complain about are the girls are really itchy.  Out to lunch a few days ago, I told Gav I wanted to scratch them off and I asked him Christmas day if he thought his family would notice if I took my bra off!    

Daddy still says things aren't feeling real yet, but I see how he's looking at us!  At his work Christmas party he told me he missed me.  By that he means partying with me.  Apparently, other years I would have been the life of that party.  I took this as a compliment.

We had our 2nd trimester ultrasound on New Year's Eve.  It was amazing, and I wasn't expecting to see all we got to see.  We were in there for almost an hour and saw the 4 chambers of the heart, the breathing tummy, kidneys, bladder, spine, legs, arms, feet, hands, nose bone, and more.  We didn't get to do the 3D part of his or her face because little one wasn't cooperating and looking the right direction.  I tried laying on my sides and walking around, but little one is low in my pelvis and wasn't going to cooperate.  Of course this means we will get another ultrasound in a few weeks so we're okay with that.  Everything we did see looks perfect and right on track.  I guess I have an anterior placenta which is fine, but I may not feel movement for a little while.  I'm glad she told me this so I don't start to freak out.

We had them put the gender in an envelope for now.  Gavin can't handle that it's right there, and I could carry it around for 5 months and not look.  Part of me wants to look because he wants to know and this is his thing too and it will make it more real for him, but I also want to hold out.  Not sure what to do.  At the new year's party, friends had lots of ideas like having the band announce it at midnight, but I stayed strong for now.

We are looking forward to 2013, but know that it will have it's challenges too like finding a house and moving.  Today, I am starting the year at the book store blogging, drinking my decaf mocha, and looking at baby name books.  I just can't believe I'm thinking about names, I didn't know if I'd ever get to do that.  Thanks for all your support in 2012!

Little one 18 weeks 1 day

All the wonderful presents from our surprise shower.  This baby is spoiled already!  Can you see who he or she will be cheering for?

The bump at 18 weeks 1 day, New Year's Eve.  Holding the gender envelope!